I never question anything Elon Musk does anymore.

From flame throwers to brain chip implants to building a fucking space fleet, when Elon Musk shows us his homework, he’s not doing it to create hype.  He’s doing it because he’s for real and this ‘Tesla Bot’ is real, kids.

https://twitter.com/SawyerMerritt/status/1428540085297950720?s=20

The Tesla Bot was unveiled yesterday at Tesla’s ‘AI day’ where Elon and a few execs and engineers laid out some of Tesla’s latest advancements in artificial intelligence across all platforms and the Tesla bot concept was finally released and it’s a fucking MINDBENDER.

pic.twitter.com/Wuxt4I3Ar9

— Sawyer Merritt (@SawyerMerritt) August 20, 2021

Prototype will be ready in 2022

— Sawyer Merritt (@SawyerMerritt) August 20, 2021

Elon says these Tesla Bots are meant to do menial repetitive work humans hate and can work 24 hours a day.

Tesla Bot is a 125 pound 5’8” humanoid robot. Launch goal: some time next year.

(Of course, full self-driving has been promised for years as well.)

Musk went out of his way to reassure people who have been raised on movies with killer bots that this will not be dangerous.

“We’re setting it such that it is at a mechanical level, a physical level, that you can run away from it,” Musk, who has warned about the dangers of AI, said. “And most likely overpower it.”

The Tesla Bot is intended to automate repetitive tasks, creating a future in which physical work will be a choice, not a requirement. It will eventually have labor force and job implications, Musk acknowledged, saying that universal basic income, or UBI, will eventually be a necessity. And, he said, it will be able to accomplish extremely complex and challenging tasks — for a robot — such as obeying an order to pick up a bolt and attach it to a machine with a wrench.

Why a human form?

It’s intended to be friendly and navigate a world built for humans. And at only 125 pounds and with a carrying capacity of 45 pounds, it won’t be a military or industrial threat. Top speed will be only five miles per hour, and lifting capacity with outstretched arms is only 10 pounds.

The Tesla Bot will deadlift 150 pounds, however.

Musk toys with us about release dates but you can bet your sweet human ass the US and other global superpowers are thinking of ways they can persuade/kidnap Musk into turning these house bots into an AI killing machine.

https://twitter.com/lterrell_/status/1428553776139587587?s=20

I was worried shit was gonna get all iRobot and then I saw the stars and realized that I can take this gangly ass bitch pic.twitter.com/VQ0opTtw8a

— JANUS! AT THE DISCO! (@ItsAuntieChrist) August 20, 2021

I shit my futuristic pants this week watching Boston Dynamics robots doing parkour like a 22-year-old street kid, so this is just the AI cherry on top of my mind-blowing week.

https://crier.co/news/video-boston-dynamic-robots-are-now-doing-parkour-and-its-terrifying-2/

If Musk can set these Tesla Bots to ‘week and boring’ instead of ‘MURDER’, I’m in. The list of things I fucking HATE doing would be A LOT shorter and we’d probably have all kinds of time to do things that made us happier or more profitable individuals in the process.

You’d have a perpetual maid to do virtually anything you want in terms of what you hate doing.

Dishes

Laundry (washing and folding)

Talking on the phone to people (everyone)

Cleaning the shitters

Vacuum and mopping

Raking

Weed pulling

Joint rolling

Lawn mowing

Helping my friends move

Personal security

House sitter and dog walker

The outlier will be whether or not Musk has the skeleton key mess with the settings of the upcoming Tesla Bot army invasion.

That’s the shit that keeps me up at night.  Sort of.  Actually not really.  I’m out like a light at 10 pm thanks to some Afghani Drifter and 10 mg of melatonin.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eI9IlAQGgZM

DB