Fitness model/influencer and Mother of New York Jets first-round draft pick Zach Wilson wants us all to know Disneyland is ‘hotter than a whore in church”.

Zach’s gonna love his mom’s social media habits when the Jets faithful start calling for his head after his first loss as the New York Jets QB.  You know some Jets super freak is going to call for Mrs. Wilson’s account to be suspended because she’s a distraction to the team.  Guaranteed the first time someone shades Zach with a shit tweet for throwing a pick 6, she’s going to go ballistic and that’s the kind of content I’m here for.

Her heat might have been a bigger story on her son’s draft-day because she was ham-and-egging it for the camera, but she’s going to LOVE her newfound fame.  She’s already at a self-important point when she wants to get all of her thoughts into a one-minute TikTok video as if we give a shit about her kids being able to cook.  That’s great.  They can make grilled cheese when you’re dead.  Awesome.  You know what would be even MORE awesome.  If they made roasted lamb with peas and mint sauce while you were alive, so, you’re not that awesome, Lisa.

That poor kid is fucked and he probably hasn’t rented an apartment in New Jersey yet.