Thirty Percent Of YOU Haven’t Had Sex In Over A Year…

Mar 30, 2019


WaPo: The share of U.S. adults reporting no sex in the past year reached an all-time high in 2018, underscoring a three-decade trend line marked by an aging population and higher numbers of unattached people.

But among the 23 percent of adults — or nearly 1 in 4 — who spent the year in a celibate state, a much larger than expected number of them were twentysomething men, according to the latest data from the General Social Survey.

Experts who study Americans’ bedroom habits say there are a number of factors driving the Great American Sex Drought. Age is one of them: The 60 and older demographic climbed from 18 percent of the population in 1996 to 26 percent in 2018, according to the survey. The share reporting no sex has consistently hovered around 50 percent, and because that age group is growing relative to everyone else, it has the net effect of reducing the overall population’s likelihood of having sex.

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It’s never a good sign for humanity when studies like this come out.  It’s another stark reminder of how truly and deeply screwed the world is.

Honey bees aren’t having sex, The Panda’s refuse to fuck, and now Humans (dolphins are the only other mammal who get it in for pleasure…little known fact for your Saturday).  Panda’s are a Darwinian Fail.  It’s the Honey Bees and now human’s we have to worry about.

My theory?  We’ve crossed the Rubicon of laziness into Wall-E territory.

Pixar’s 2008 release Wall-E was more of a glimpse into the future than a warning sign.

The Premise:

Humankind became so fucking lazy they vacated earth for a life of UBER Laziness aboard a space ship capable of catering to your every physical need.   Not having sex is peak lazy.

When the fucking rate falls by 30 %, there should be a sexual doomsday clock that goes off like a natural disaster alert.  Just a quick reminder you to get dangerous for the good of humanity.

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Get off the Fortnite and get into your spouse.   Grab a couple of other activist’s Like Captain Short-Shorts and create life or die trying.  Think of it like the Handmaids Tale minus the egregious treatment of fertile women in an attempt to repopulate via patriarchal slavery.

It’s that or your super great grandkids will spend hundreds of years floating through space on fat chairs due to muscular atrophy from extreme inactivity.

Technically speaking, it doesn’t sound terrible.



Dean Blundell

Dean Blundell is a Canadian radio personality. Best known as a longtime morning host on CFNY-FM (The Edge) in Toronto, Ontario. In 2015 he was named the new morning host on sports radio station CJCL (Sportsnet 590 The Fan). Dean started his career in radio in 2001 and for nearly 20 years been entertaining the radio audience. Dean’s newest venture is the launch of his site and podcast which is gaining tremendous momentum across North America.

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