Source:   Police are trying to track down a man who spent three hours licking a doorbell at a California home. “I thought I’d seen it all, but this takes the cake,” neighbor Francisco Javier Estrada told KION.  Surveillance cameras caught Roberto Daniel Arroyo in the act.
The Dungans said they were not home at the time, but their children were inside the house sleeping.  Police said a newly installed surveillance system helped them investigate the case.  “We were pleasantly surprised the image was so clear it didn’t take us long to identify the individual,” Salina Police Department spokesperson Miguel Cabrera said.  The security cameras also caught Arroyo moving an extension cord to the front yard and relieving himself.

We live in a ridiculous time where it’s more important to be sensitive to the sexual calamity this fuckjob has than to call this guy a fuckjob and universally, move on.   There’s no affliction for someone who’s sexually attracted to a doorbell, right?

Correct.  There’s a reason for that.  Because this is fucked and he’s a fuckjob.

Have a great day!